Before a bill proposing campus carry is introduced in the Badger State, students at the University of Wisconsin in Madison are ready to take up arms in protest.

Well, not arms, but a different body part… kind of.

Representative Jesse Kremer of Kewaskum, WI said campus carry is one of several pro-gun initiatives he plans to introduce early in the coming legislative session and is currently working with other Republican lawmakers on a bill to introduce constitutional carry.

“Would it not be more effective to publicize, as other states do, that you don’t know if, or who, will be ready to protect students at a moments notice in a school setting? There is a lot of good in this world, but also evil,” Kremer said regarding his campus carry legislation. “The public must remain vigilant and lawmakers proactive regarding the security and safety of their constituents, especially those who are most vulnerable.”

But in Madison, where the most delicate snowflakes in the state tend to cluster, activists will be arming UW students with dildos “as a method of fighting the absurdity of guns in classrooms,” said sophomore Katherine Kerwin, member of the Associated Students of Madison student council and driving force behind the Madtown mayhem.

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